And I know you know what first time I’m talking about…It was freezing cold on December 6th, 1963, the night before my 18th birthday. I was on my way with my date, flying as fast as we could through the west side of NYC to his apartment. Hands tightly clasped together, our palms crackled with […]
Why Did I Block and Report You?
Every once in a while, some douchebag who thinks I’m as naive as new snow makes a smarmy comment on one of my articles, and joins my newsletter.
SOMETIMES YA JUST NEEDS A HUG.
I miss my sweet doggie so much. It’s been more than 20 years since I last saw her, but I think of her every day. She was the sweetest Being I ever met. She was English sheepdog size and appearance, except she had the sweet button nose face and curly tail of a Husky. She […]
Does Your Partner Have the Right to Strik...
No. Not Ever. I could feel my body start to contract into itself, shrinking, freezing. My head fell, my chin pressing against my chest. I vaguely noticed my feet press down and anchor themselves to the floor. I wondered if it would be a punch or a slap this time. Even if I had thought […]
No More Letting Baby Cry Herself Out!
I had to slowly slowly convince myself to open to receive any thoughts at all that I might be worthy, and even lovable. In a reel I watched tonight by a gal whose name I never caught, she explains how parents used to be advised to ‘let the baby cry itself out.’ That the baby […]
How I Was Rescued from My Dreary Reality,...
There have been several times in my life when Angels boldly stepped in and picked my sorry arse up and sent me packing to other, better places. This was one of them. Her name was Cynthia, and there is no one else like her anywhere. My dear friend Cynthia and I met at a week-long […]
Once in A Lifetime
They were jumping in and out of the water so smoothly, so fast, that it looked like a fountain of silvery sea flesh. When my boys were young, we lived in Hawaii on the island of Kaua’i, in Kekaha, a tiny little sugar town. The main residents were mostly Filipinos and Puerto Ricans who worked […]
I Was Damned if I Was Going to Allow Hard...
Nights when magical swaths of stars would span the entire ceiling above, making it seem as light as noon. Bright evening lightning shows burst through the dark evenings on the far horizon… Living in New Mexico in the early 1990s was one of the darkest times of my entire life. I was perpetually depressed, never […]
Our Disconnect from the Cycles of Life
We allow little mundane BS things to distract and steal our attention away from what’s important: being with and cherishing the ones we love most, caring for those who need and want our love, attention, and affection. Lately I see so many posts on facebook by folks who have lost friends and family from covid […]
Freezing to Death for 3000 Miles On the B...
Semi trucks started edging us sideways, pushing into our lane, trying to run us off the road. Gas stations and roadside restaurants saw us coming, switched their ‘open’ signs to ‘closed’ in their windows and front doors. 1966. I was 21, living in an upstairs apartment on Mason Street in North Beach, San Francisco. I […]
“Something Amazing Is About to Happen,” H
It can be painfully hard to let go of the what-ifs and the blame/shames, he-did-it-to-me’s and the she’s-such-a … — or the what-am-I-going-to-do . . . I’ve been a devoted student of metaphysics for decades. One of the most basic things I learned when I began to study the beyond-ordinary is that what you give your attention to turns up in […]
Your Work Doesn’t Speak for Itself
It was only after that decision that people started seeing things through my eyes. They started comprehending the value of art – the effects of color, the harmonizing of life through good design, the pleasure a painting or sculpture could bring . . . I’m a stone carver, painter, author and book designer— among other […]
The Tale of Frank and Lilly of Desolation...
In a frozen stand-off, all three halted, just a few feet from each other. Like wooden soldiers, they stood silent in the middle of the street. Slowly, Frank reached up and tipped his hat, took Lilly’s hand and walked on. “No, Frank, don’t! He didn’t mean it!” Lilly exclaimed. “Don’t hold me back this time, […]
How Could You Possibly Forget that Trauma
In sessions with my clients, I’ve heard them say, “I didn’t even remember that until today! It’s been years since it happened!” I’ve experienced that same forgetting, myself: I was raped several times between the ages of 13 and 19 when I lived in New York City. But if you had asked me before this […]
HELPING LITTLE TINA STOP HER TANTRUMS
My friend Rachel had two grand-daughters, aged 2 and 4. The two-year-old, Tina, was prone to throwing some mean tantrums. Rachel was concentrating on finishing up a 3-year back-to-college program, and found it difficult to deal with the kids’ high energy — especially the tantrums — when the girls came to visit her. She was […]
SIGNALS that THERE’S SOMETHING GOING ON U
Recently when I was speaking with my advisor about a business and marketing plan we were creating for my coaching, I started to get really sleepy. I felt like if I didn’t lie down right now I would simply collapse on the floor in a big ole slippery puddle. I had been blazing wide awake […]
WHAT’S YOUR REAL JOB?
A friend tells me life equals pain. I say life equals love. It’s all in the focus of attention. I got a call from an artist friend, all upset and depressed and crying because of recent world events. She said, “When I look at how the world has gotten, I think why bother with making […]
PATTY CAKE
Ahhh, yes! A bunch of innocent delightful critters playing in a lovely world where things are the way they’re supposed to be: open, loving, caring, fun, creative and compassionate…. PATTY CAKE, PATTY CAKE, BAKER’S MAN – Run away! Run Away! Fast as you can! How I wish I could. With the BS happening now across […]
TOMATOES, THE PERFECT FOOD
A lament for the delicious mainstay of almost every lunch and dinner since childhood. What have they done to my beautiful fruits??? I adore tomatoes. In a perfect world, I’d have a godzilla-sized garden with way too many varieties that would produce way too many tomatoes to be able to eat them all, and they […]
HOW I DEAL WITH DESTRUCTIVE MONEY BELIEFS
Annie and I allowed ourselves to face the debilitating beliefs we had about ourselves, money, and business. Here’s what happened. Not too long ago, my buddy Annie and I got together on zoom, and did some inside work on our relationships with money. Hahaha — no, we weren’t going to get a divorce from money! Quite the […]
BE KIND. NO MATTER WHAT.
We learn to hide the pain. We feel unacceptable. We learn to present happy faces, calm demeanors, soft voices — where what we really feel like doing is screaming until our throats rip apart. Be kind. That’s what comes to mind when I see people getting down on folks who write about being depressed and […]
JAM the LOW FREQUENCIES with the HIGHEST ...
How we can drum in a new era of joy, peace, beauty, and love. I guess I’m still an old hippie at heart. I look at what’s going down in the world right now, and remember the 60s, and how the world looked upside down and crazy, then, too. Out of that ‘bad’ time, men’s […]
TAKE BACK YOUR POWER!
I don’t know about you, but I’m sick to death of people telling me what I ‘should’ buy or ‘should’ do. Use the Law of Attraction! Do this technique! You should eat green! You should stop eating sugar! Use this technique to get more clients! You should…you should…you should! NO! I shouldn’t! And I won’t, […]
YOU’RE AN AUTHOR. OR NOT.
You wouldn’t have gotten the idea to do what you do, and then the idea to share it with others, and you wouldn’t have been asked to write a book if no one cared, if the Universe hadn’t conspired to get all those people to say to you ‘you should write a book on that!’ […]
WHY WOMEN ARTISTS FAIL(ed)
I had deeply internalized all those negative, destructive messages and made them into my own beliefs that >I< was a failure, that >I< was the one to blame, and that >I< would ‘never make it’ – I attended an intense marketing workshop for women artists a while back. It made me cry. It put me […]
DIZZY ON MY FEET
On a larger scale, there were a couple times I’d simply not be driving anymore. The first time that happened, I about lost it. How did I get home, sitting at my kitchen table… There are times in my life when my entire mental/emotional/physical system goes on dizzy-mode. It started in the early 90s when […]
HOW I REDESIGNED MY FUTURE
I threw out all of the first and second stage work — it was horrendous. I wouldn’t want my worst enemy to have to suffer seeing those designs on even his underwear. In January of 2021, I took a plunge and enrolled in an intense 3-month long course in surface/pattern design. In case you don’t […]
DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!
It’s so easy to offer glib platitudinous directions! What makes it OK for one person to tell another what to do, be or have? I think we ought to just shut the heck up and stop telling people what to do. Have you noticed how business coaches, spiritual teachers, gurus and guides, coaches and trainers […]
WASABI
You know those moments where an absolutely exquisite moment of silence descends upon a space before everything erupts into chaos all around you? It was 1966. I was 21. I was new to California culture, having lived back East up until then. I had come to stay with my aunt and uncle in San Francisco […]
HOW SAYING “I FORGIVE YOU” SAVED HER LIFE
Sitting like a little kid, with her legs straight out in front of her, she was shock-white, with glazed- eyes seeing nothing. The webbing between her left hand first finger and thumb … My mother and I got into a huge argument during my senior-year spring break. We disagreed so vehemently that after three days, […]